SHOW vs. TELL

I went to the North Texas SCBWI Conference and, as always, heard a lot of great information and inspiring talks. Especially one by Jill Alexander on what VOICE isn't. But, just as VOICE is difficult for writers to understand, I believe the dreaded "Show don't Tell" is worse.

I don't want to call it a revelation, but this concept was hammered in my brain after seeing the movie, "Guilt Trip" with Seth Rogen and Barbara Streisand.

As I watched the movie I kept thinking, That is my mother. Only, I didn't know how right I was until I saw my mother the following week.

TELLING IS . . . 

WHAT MOTHERS DO to get us to feel something…

• Grateful
• Guilt
• Happiness

“I did this and this and this for you, and you should be (feel)…”

Or

“Be careful or you will hurt yourself…”

AS A CHILD, I WANT TO figure out for myself how I feel about the circumstances I am in.

If I get hurt, then I get hurt. Let me do it by myself.


AUTHORS DO THIS WITH THEIR CHARACTERS…

1. Authors want to make sure the reader can make the connection. As a beginning author I didn't trust that the Reader would be able to figure it out. Just like our mothers don't want to trust us, authors want to make it obvious.

During one of my rewrites in my book, I had the sentence... “Why do I get myself all worked up, like Mom does?”

My book is titled Crazy Like Mom. I didn't need to add like Mom does because as the reader follows my character through her day, he/she will be able to make the comparisons by themselves.

2. Authors want the Reader to have certain emotions shared between the characters, so authors do this with backstory.

In a prior version I wrote this paragraph to (what I thought was show) describe how the main character feels about her relationship with her brother.

     "Jack is too busy to help the way he did last year—doing each problem with me to see who got it done first, then making sure I got the answer right. If I ask him, though, he’ll review my work to make sure it’s correct. I scribble out the problems, and spend what seems like forever working on them, and then set the homework aside for Jack to correct when he gets home."

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH... That is TELLING or AKA Word Vomit. And the information in the paragraph was so yesterday. The reader wants to know what my character feeling now?

Can I sum up the previous 73-word paragraph into 26 words? You bet.

     "I decide to blow-off math. Algebra isn't one of my best subjects, and since no one in my family gives a crap about my mathematical future, why should I care."

AS A READER I WANT TO…

• Be in the moment with the main character. 
• I don’t want to feel what the author wants me to feel. I might feel what the m/c feels, but I want the freedom to disagree depending on my personal experiences. 
• I want to be in the situation instead of being forced to wear the situation as an overcoat.  

Writing Religion in Contemporary Children's Literature

As I struggle with what seems like the millionth re-write of my novel, I am torn between creating a character that believes in God, while explaining that science (i.e. medication) is sometimes needed to make a person whole.

I am a Christian and a person who suffers from manic depression, and many of the events in my story are true, including how I believed I was possessed, and how I searched for cures to make me whole. A serious depressive episode feels like you've fallen into the outer darkness of Hell. No matter how hard I prayed, it seemed like God—nor anyone else—could hear my cries for help. I prayed to be saved from the pain and mental anguish I was trapped in.

God answered my prayers, but not in the way many Christians would expect. It was not in some golden light pulling me up and out of the pit of despair in one miraculous event. God answered my prayers by getting me the help I needed. It took hospitalization, and being properly diagnosed with bi-polar disorder, and finally receiving extra help through medication, to lift me out from the hell I was in. How do I share that with my readers, if I don’t bring God into my story? It’s impossible. Just as explaining the benefits of proper treatment for mental illness is important. The two are entwined.

During my reflection on how to incorporate the theme of my book, asking God for help, I thought of other mainstream books that incorporated Christian ideals into their themes. Here are just a few:

The Bronze Bow by Elizabeth George Speare - In 1962, The Bronze Bow won the Newbery Medal. All these years later, it hasn't lost its message and I thought it was a great book. It reinforces the importance of tolerance and shows the importance of "Love Thy Neighbor" through the eyes of a boy set on vengeance to drive out the Romans from Jerusalem. The main character, who once was driven by hatred, experiences a change in heart after hearing Jesus preach about love and forgiveness.

A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle -The following year, in 1963, A Wrinkle in Time won the Newbery Medal. I was surprised how the themes of the book, love and freewill, are not only a universal principles, but they also represent Jesus’ sacrifice for us by comparing it to Meg’s (the main characters) willingness to sacrifice her life for her brother, Charles Wallace.  When interviewed, Madeleine L’Engle said, “I am a Writer first and a Christian second.” But, I wonder, how much of her beliefs were absorbed in her writing experience?

The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis - As foretold in Narnia prophesy, two sons of Adam (Peter and Edward) and two daughters of Eve (Susan and Lucy) will come help Aslan (the Lion) fight against evil. When one of the children (Edward) falls for the trappings of the White Which, Aslin sacrifices himself for Edward. Aslan conquers death to live again and help the children and other Narnia creatures fight in a war with the White Witch. Sounds like a Christian message to me.

The Harry Potter Series by J.K. Rowling - From the beginning of the first book, Harry Potter and the Sorcorers Stone, the act of sacrificing one’s self for others is the prominent theme as Harry’s mother gave her life for him. By the seventh book, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Harry learns that it is through his death, that others may live. This is why Harry freely chooses to sacrifice himself to save others. Did J.K. Rowling mean to add this theme to her books? The following link is an interview by a reporter from MTV, so you can decide for yourself.

http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1572107/jk-rowling-talks-about-christian-imagery.jhtml

Autor Quote: William Faulkner on Writing

“Read, read, read. Read everything--trash, classics, good and bad, and see how they do it. Just like a carpenter who works as an apprentice and studies the master. Read! You'll absorb it.

Then write. If it's good, you'll find out. If it's not, throw it out of the window.”

Author Quote: Mark Twain on the "Show Don't Tell" Writing Principal

"Don't say the old lady screamed- 

bring her on and let her scream." 

Book Review: Nothing but the Truth by Avi (A must read book for teachers)

If I had a conversation with someone and they told me a dilemma or interest they have in their lives, I’ll bet I can suggest a book for them to read. For Example, a girl in a writing club I used to supervise was frustrated because her mother devotes most of her attention to her autistic brother. Was it any surprised I gave her a copy of Cynthia Lord’s book Rules?

Or how another young woman in the group shared a poem about cutting, so I lent her a copy of Cut by Patricia McCormick.

Or how I bought a copy of Laura Amy Shultz’s Newbery Medal picture book of Medieval poems, Good Masters, Sweet Ladies, for Lucy’s social studies teacher to share with the students—albeit, I doubt if he ever did.

You name the subject, I can suggest a book. So, when Lucy told me that her favorite teacher is continually disrespected in English class, I pulled out Avi’s book, Nothing But The Truth, and told Lucy to lend it to her. When I picked Lucy up from school, I asked her if she gave her teacher the book. Lucy started crying and told me that her teacher is too much like the teacher in the book, and she didn't want to upset her.

Nothing but the Truth is a must read for every middle and high school teacher. Lucy’s eighth grade teacher assigned it to the class, and I thought it was a wonderful book for students to read. It was interesting to get Lucy’s perspective (as a teen) versus mine (as an adult).

I would bet my hard-earned money— I get nauseous when I lose a roll of nickels at a slot machine in Las Vegas, so you know I believe it’s a sure thing I’ll win—that every teacher has had a student in their class like the main character, Philip Maloy, though maybe not to the extent of the plot.

One of the things I appreciated about this book was the fact it showed the extent of self-absorption of teens today, and how blindly parents jump to defend bad behavior in school. There is no happy ending for any of the parties involved, but in my opinion (as an adult) I believed the real victim was the teacher. The book shows teen narcissism, to the point the main character destroyed his desires in the process. What disturbed me the most was no one, other students included, stood up for the dedicated teacher.

I am not a teacher, so I have no bias in my opinion. I am a mother, who teaches my child how to show respect for her elders, and go to school to learn.

I'm airing out a little frustration in this next paragraph, not at one particular teacher but at the California school system in general...

However, I fought for four years to have my daughter tested for a learning disability after seeing her struggle every night with homework. My concerns were not toward any particular teacher, but toward the establishment who told me that because her California test scores were too high to warrant such tests. Not giving up, I went to an independent agency.

After a series of tests, it was shown that Lucy has a condition called dysgraphia. Finally, after four-and-a-half years of petitioning for extra time for Lucy to finish class assignments or to have notes be made available, she was given a 504 plan.

The point is, a responsible parent is involved in their child's learning. To find out how Philip's parents handled the problem, read the book and find out.

Writing Craft: Thanks, But This Isn't For Us by Jessica Page Morrell

I recently read a blog on Darcy Patterson's Fiction Notes which disgusted Jessica's book on why editors reject manuscripts. In Patterson's post she gave some common examples. Curious for more, I ordered the book from Amazon, and I was digging into the reasons why my novel might not be up to par within two days.

Whenever I read a book on craft, I insert my characters into the situations and examples given. Over the six years I've been working on my novel, I can't help but smile when I read about a basic writer's blunder I stumbled over--but I persevered and learned the correct process to fix it.

In the first few chapters Morrell gives examples of basic writing mistakes followed by examples of how to make your first paragraph sing as if it where a Siren calling, "Read on, and on, and on..."  However, the reason why I'm taking time to ignore the call of Morrell's Siren, is to type an interesting blurb she says about plot on page 57.

"Plot is movement and a record of change. These changes--inflicted on the protagonist or group of characters--alter their fortunes, choices, and beliefs."

The above quote though, struck me as a vital part of my novel's circulatory system, and not just a means to an end.

My plot is the vein, and it carries my main character's experiences through its blood flow to Lucinda. She can be attacked by viruses and cholesterol. How she handles the experiences are what effect her overall health and well being as a character. So... I can have her take antibiotics (listen to advice of another character) or put a band aid on it, but whatever she does it effects her health.

Author Review: Avi

Avi is another author who has won three Newbery awards. They include the following:

Crispin, The Cross of Lead, published by Hyperion, Copyright 2002.

The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle, published by Harper Trophy, Copyright 1990.

Nothing but the Truth, published by Harper Trophy, Copyright 1991


Crispin, The Cross of Lead won the Newbery Medal, along with various other awards and accolades. I enjoyed it for two reasons. One, it was a novel included on my list by Deborah Halverson to teach me about voice, and the second reason being it was on my list to read every Newbery book awarded—a lofty goal, to which I’ll be working on till I die.

Because it is set in 1377 A.D. England, I purchased thirty-five copies for my daughter’s 7th grade English class. Her teacher was attempting to match his reading selections to the history curriculum, since the students were studying the medieval period, this book along with most of Karen Cushman’s books would be a logical choice to add a little historical fiction to their studies.

Unfortunately, the books the teacher chose were, The Merry Adventures of Robin Hood by Howard Pile, which was dropped after the second chapter because the students couldn't understand the colloquialism of old English, and a book by Susan Cooper titled King of Shadows. Although my daughter thoroughly enjoyed the story of a modern day theater student, being transported though time to perform in a Shakespearean play, I don’t think it would have touched on the historical aspects the way Avi’s book does.

Here is a summary of Avi's Crispin, Cross of Lead: After his mother’s death, thirteen-year-old Christian is forced to flee his home to avoid being murdered. It is through his adventure to stay alive that he finds out who is really is.

~~~~

The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle won Avi a Newbery Honor. For me, the voice of the main character stood out and demanded my attention more that Crispin, although I loved each one equally. It is the story about well-to-do family from Rhode Island who sends their daughter Charlotte, a thirteen-year- old girl to boarding school in England in the year 1832.It is on her way back to America when her adventure begins.

Many agents and editors bring their favorite books to conference and read the first paragraph to show how important voice is. This is one of the books I would use to prove my point. Here is the first few lines: “Not every thirteen-year-old girl is accused of murder, brought to trial, and found guilty. But I was just such a girl, and my story is worth relating even if it did happen years ago.”

Now, go buy this book and follow her adventure.

~~~~~

Another important book which any high school teacher would find relevant is Nothing but the Truth. This book was yet another Newbery Honor for this incredible author, and it deserves its own review, so please read the next blog to explore its importance in today’s school system.

~~~~~

Aside from these books, Avi has written many, many others. Another book I appreciated was The Fighting Ground, published by Harper Trophy, Copyright  1984. It is the story is about a thirteen-year-old boy who chooses to run away from home during the Revolutionary war.

As in most children’s books, adventures usually span a certain period in time. For Harry Potter, each stand alone book covers a school year. Other books cover a semester, or a summer. The Fighting Ground was the first book I've read where the adventure occurs within a twenty-four hour period, (A more recent book which covers a twenty-four hour period is 13 Reason's Why by Jay Asher. It is a serious subject YA book which I will give my thoughts in a separate review.)

In The Fighting Ground, Avi also sets an example of how to incorporate foreign speaking dialogue into a novel. Instead of writing the German word followed by the English translation directly after with commas, Avi puts his translation as an addition in the back of the book. I think this added to the confusion the main character experienced at not understanding what the German soldiers were saying along with the reader.